Building a Caring Classroom Community: How and Why Building Relationships is Important

Last updated on July 8th, 2023 at 09:08 pm

You may have attended a professional development or staff meeting on the importance of building relationships with your students. I know I have attended many and felt they were a waste of time. Same ol’ same ol.’ Just let me teach.

However, building a quality relationship with each and every student in your classroom is very important! It will set the tone for your whole year. It’s the difference between your students wanting to work for you or against you. I’m not saying having a relationship with THAT student will stop THAT behavior, but it may keep you from being harmed by THAT student.

Building a relationship with your students starts on day one. It starts with a smile and a “Welcome, I’m glad you’re here.” It’s getting to know your students’ names and how to pronounce them correctly, first names and last names along with their preferred name. It’s, also, not just about you building a relationship with your students, but your students building relationships with each other. It’s important for them to learn each other’s names and have time to interact and dare I say, play with each other.  When students form a caring relationship with each other, they are more inclusive of each other’s differences and cheer each other on.

I let my students know from the first day that we are a team and teams work together. We don’t all have to be friends, but we do have to get along. By the end of the week we have come up with team names, because all teams have a name, and we’ve voted on the name the class likes best. I refer to the class by that name during the whole year. I will include it on things like our morning message and my classroom newsletter. We have had some interesting names in the past such as: Bats, Cheerleaders, Stars, Ice Creams. Other teachers I know do something similar by having a classroom family. By establishing your class as a team or family that works together and supports each other, you are creating a positive atmosphere that will be conducive to many amazing learning moments throughout the whole year!

Most of the activities I do to build relationships are done during our morning meeting that we have each day. Here are some activities I do doing the first week of school to begin relationship building with my students:

1. Morning Greeting-I establish appropriate morning greetings the students and I give to each other each morning. I feel it is very important to say good morning to each student individually every day. This is done before morning meeting during our morning song where students clean up, say good morning to each other and me, and get in their spot ready to learn. The choices vary, but some examples are hug, hand shake, fist bump, high five, wave. Students are allowed to say no to any greeting they don’t want to participate in. I have had several students who don’t like to be touched at all. I make that very clear when we go over expectations.  

2. All About Me bags-I send home a paper lunchbag with 3-4 students each day with directions attached for the students to put 4 objects in the bag that tell about them. They must fit inside the bag. The bag is to be returned the next day. I, also, do a sample bag about me before sending home the first bags. The students love being able to do a show & tell about themselves and everyone gets to learn more about each other. I take note during this time about the likes of my students and what is important to them. Here’s the note to attach to the bag from A Love for Teaching: http://alove4teaching.blogspot.com/2012/07/all-about-me-bag.html?m=1

3. Stand up/Switch Sides-I have used this activity and seen this activity done both ways. You can use a premade list or make one of your own of statements. Students either stand up if it is true or switch to the other side of the room. For example, stand up if you like to go to the beach. Students love this activity because they get to see that they all have things in common with each other and their teacher, if you choose to participate. They have one on Go Noodle: https://www.gonoodle.com/

4. Find a Friend-I use a Find a Friend Sheet for students to find friends who like certain activities. This gets them talking to each other and by listening to them, I get to know them better, too. Here is one free on TeachersPayTeachers: https://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Product/Back-to-School-Activity-Find-Someone-Who-Attitude-Survey-2010888?epik=dj0yJnU9YVZTNWNPX05SNTh5aWZJdU1xTi1aeWpDYUR5bFExb3UmcD0wJm49cUhNY0UwSTZ0bHZ6OVVJLVFnSjZmdyZ0PUFBQUFBR0s3Snhr

5. Play Name Games-The first day we just roll a ball or toss an object around and each student says their name in a complete sentence and we say, “Hi, student name.” The next day we play Hickety-Pickety-Bumblebee. Here is the game on Crisscross Applesauce in First Grade: http://crisscrossapplesauceinfirstgrade.blogspot.com/2012/04/morning-meeting-freebie.html

6. How Do You Feel About? sheet-Students will color in a face that represents their feelings about different subjects. I collect them and look them over to get an idea of what subjects my students like and dislike. This helps me know how to encourage particular students or what subject I may need to promote a bit more. Here it is from First Grade Centers and More: https://www.firstgradecentersandmore.com/2016/07/christmas-in-july.html

7. Pass the Clap-My students really had a fun with this one! It was just us sitting in a circle with our hands facing upward. One hand was on top of the student on one side and under the student on the other side. I reached my free hand over and clapped the student’s hand, then that student reached their hand over and did the same all the way around the circle. Once you get better at it, you can see how fast the clap can travel.  It was a good activity for getting my students to learn how to work together and paying attention. Here is a free pdf of the game from Mindful Practices: https://mindfulpractices.us/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/pass-the-cool-clap.pdf

8. Making Ourself and Writing Our Favorites-The students get to create their face on a head outline and complete a sheet with their favorites. I hang this in the classroom or the hallway as one of our first projects. This is another activity that helps the students to see their similarities and embrace their differences. Here is one that I like from Fairy Poppins: https://www.fairypoppins.com/all-about-me-writing-craft/

9. All About My Child Sheet-I send home a sheet for the families to complete that gives me information about their child. I either send this home during Meet the Teacher or during the first week of school. And I do read them. Your students’ caregivers will give you some excellent information on these forms for connecting with your students. This is the form I use and it’s free from The Proactive Classroom: https://theproactiveclassroomblog.wordpress.com/2018/07/23/build-classroom-community-before-the-first-day-of-school/     

10. Feelings Check-In-I wish I had done this every year of teaching. A feelings check-in can be done in many ways such as creating a feelings pocket chart where students place their name on where they are feeling when they arrive in the morning or having students draw a feelings face on a sticky note and placing it in a designated spot. Having a feelings check-in gives you a quick glance of where your students are coming from in the morning. It can help start a conversation, thus building a deeper connection with your students. Furthermore, it works on those social-emotional skills. This activity is started during the first week, or two if needed, of school, but is used the whole year.

These are a selection of activities I use during the first week, but I continue to build upon the relationship I have formed with my students and between my students throughout the school year. These activities may be revisited later in the year, perhaps when a new student joins the class or just for fun when you have a few extra minutes. And if you have been trained in Restorative Practices you can use a circle for relationship building, too. If you haven’t been trained you can still use the circle idea.  Here is a great article that describes Restorative Circles in more detail from Edutopia: https://www.edutopia.org/article/building-community-restorative-circles

We all want a caring classroom community because we know that students learn best in that type of environment. So to sum up, if you want to create a caring classroom community where students respect you and respect each other, it is imperative that you take the time to get to know your students and give them the time to get to know each other. For more on this topic, please, read my post Keep Relationships Growing Throughout the Year.